My Sundays with Kayla

Hi everyone, I would like to tell you about someone who is one of the most important people in my life and my favorite person ever. My friend Kayla. I love her very much, and she means the world to me. She will forever hold a special place in my heart for as long as I live. I want to take a moment to share with you why she is so special and how she has impacted my life.

When I think of Kayla, the first word that comes to mind is caring. She's kind, open-minded, and fun, with a big heart. Her family, especially her sister and kids, love her dearly. They'd probably describe her as kind and loving, just like I do. Kayla is a beautiful person, both inside and out. Her kind eyes and warm smile reflect her caring nature. She has some interesting tattoos and piercings that reflect her unique style.

How We Met 

On January 2nd, 2019, a cold New England winter day, I met my friend Kayla. I had been living with my trach for about two months already and was recovering at a pretty rapid pace, but I still wasn't talking much yet. The healthcare agency, Bayada, had called us to say they were sending out a new aide named Kayla. I thought it was a little odd that they were sending an aide, as aides weren't really supposed to do anything with the trach, but we agreed to the meet and greet visit.

Around 6 pm that night, a red late-model Chevrolet Tahoe pulled into the driveway and parked behind my conversion van. My mom went to the door and let Kayla in. I was positioned in my living room where my front door was behind me, so I couldn't see people who came in until they entered the room. The first thing I heard was a very sweet, friendly young voice saying, "Hello, I'm Kayla. It's nice to meet you."

I should mention that I still wasn't able to speak yet, so I couldn't respond. When Kayla entered the room, I saw she was a pretty woman, about 5'2", with beautiful eyes behind her glasses. I mouthed "hi," and she smiled. This girl gave off really good vibes and seemed like an absolute sweetheart. I liked her pretty much right away.

Kayla told us about herself: she was 28 and had two kids, a twin sister, and a brother. We later learned that she had just returned from a trip to South Africa to visit family. This international connection added an interesting dimension to her background. We told her about us and what led to me getting a tracheostomy. After a few hours of the meet and greet, Kayla had to leave. Before she did, I showed her my Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy shaving cream challenge video, and she said it looked very comfortable. I asked her if she would like to do it before she went home, and I could tell she was hoping I would ask because she seemed excited.

Without hesitation, Kayla agreed to try the challenge. My mom told her to take off her shoes and socks and got everything ready. Kayla also had a beautiful star tattoo on her leg, which I thought was really cool. My mom brought out the tub filled with shaving cream and the cue card, and we filmed Kayla doing the challenge. She loved it, saying, "It feels good!" and laughing a little.

This encounter marked the beginning of a close friendship, as Kayla ended up working for us for almost four years. Over those years, Kayla and I became close friends, forming a strong bond. I met her kids and her twin sister, and we all developed a strong connection.

Shared Experiences and Memorable Moments

Kayla and I share many interests. We both love horror movies, country music, Ram trucks, and dark humor. One of our favorite activities is the Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy challenge, where we put our feet in shaving cream. Kayla really enjoys this, often saying the shaving cream feels super soft and smooth on her feet. Her kids love participating in this challenge too, making it a fun family activity. We've made it a tradition to do this challenge on holidays.

We also occasionally do a sensory therapy challenge together, where we put our feet in various soft and squishy textures. Kayla loves this challenge as well, and it's become a therapeutic and enjoyable experience for both of us, though we only do it on rare occasions.

I really enjoy our Sundays together. Spending time with Kayla and her kids is the highlight of my week. Her daughter is here almost every time and loves coming with her mom. She and I have a lot of fun either watching Disney movies, doing holiday challenge videos, laughing at ridiculous things, or watching me play video games, which I'm careful about choosing because she is still a child. Her son's visits are just as fun, even though he doesn't come as often. I always try to find fun things for us to do, and often my mom plays games with them. We've made so many great memories so far, including birthdays, family gatherings, and Kayla even came to an MD walk once. Every Sunday she drives an hour and a half from Westport, MA, to Yarmouthport, MA, and will get here either on time or a little early. She's been doing this for nearly four years, which really impresses me. She surprised me once after Valentine's Day in 2022 when she came down on a Monday just to put her feet in fluffy pink shaving cream for a Valentine's-themed challenge.

Looking Back and Forward

Kayla has become one of my closest friends, and I hope we can spend more time together in the future. Our friendship demonstrates how meaningful connections can form in unexpected ways, even in challenging circumstances. We've shared both laughter and tears, which has strengthened our bond. I'm grateful to Kayla for being a great friend and PCA, and for supporting me through my challenges. Her presence has made a positive impact on my life.

Update

I was writing this blog post and then forgot about it when I went to Yellowstone. I hadn't finished it before something unexpected happened: Kayla quit. On November 20, 2022, about 19 months ago (or a little over a year and a half), Kayla reluctantly gave her two weeks' notice and had to end her employment with us for personal reasons. It was absolutely devastating to both of us because she didn't want to leave; she thought she would be here forever, and we had become family. She truly enjoyed her time spent with us. I went to bed in tears that night and couldn't sleep. I understood why she had to leave, but it still sucked, to put it lightly. This was a difficult time for us, as Kayla had become such an integral part of our lives. I really miss hanging out with her every Sunday, and I'm hopeful that one day she might come back to work for us again as a PCA. It would be wonderful to resume our weekly traditions and conversations.

If I could relive one day with Kayla, it's a tough choice because I would relive any day with her and her family. Those were some of the happiest days in my life. But if I had to choose, it would be her last day as my PCA. It was a difficult day, but I wish I could have expressed my appreciation for her friendship and care more clearly. I also would try my best to convince her to reconsider ending her employment with us because I didn't want her to go, and I would say whatever I could to get her to stay. There are things I wish I'd said that I can only discuss in person, and I hope I get the chance to do so someday.

Kayla has been a significant part of my life, and I'm thankful for every moment we've shared, even the challenging ones. Whether as a PCA or just as a good friend, I look forward to the possibility of creating more great memories together in the future.